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Lag n Biejie - We can all relate!


Fishing rules

 Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.
 Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.
 Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful.

Mother to daughter advice

 Mother to daughter advice:
 Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
 But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.


New fly rod and reel

 I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife... trade I ever made.

"I caught a twenty pound salmon last week."

 "Were there any witnesses?"

 "There sure were. If there hadn't been, it would have been forty pounds."



Why fishing is better than making love

 * When you go fishing and you catch something, that's good
 - If you're making love and you catch something, that's bad.

 * Fish don't compare you to other fishermen neither.
 - And don't want to know how many other fish you caught.

 * In fishing you lie about the one that got away.
 - In loving you lie about the one you caught.

 * You can catch and release a fish. You don't have to lie, and promise to still be friends after you let it go.

 * You don't necessarily have to change your line to keep catching fish.

 * You can catch a fish on a 20-cent frozen squid.
 - If you want to catch a woman you're talking dinner and a movie minimum.

 * Fish don't mind if you fall asleep in the middle of fishing.


Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were having a great day catching fish.

 The first blonde said "This is such a great spot, we need to mark it so we can come back."

 The second blonde proceeded to put a mark on the side of the boat.

 The first blonde asked "What are you doing?"

 The second blonde replied "Marking the spot."

 "Don't be stupid" the first blonde said. "What if we don't get the same boat next time?"

Two rednecks go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment - the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. I mean they spend a fortune! The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish. As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred bucks?" The other guy says, "Wow! Then it's a good thing we didn't catch any more!"


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